An unidentified pro-genocide Holocaust (TM) survivor was re-incinerated Sunday in Boulder, Colorado by an anti-genocide activist. According to a report from ABC News that is nearly impossible to satirize, the Holocaust (TM) survivor underwent a horrific experience during World War II: He was gassed to death, buried in swamp alongside millions of other bodies, then dug up, cremated, and re-buried alongside the millions of other waterlogged cremated bodies in a mass grave that has never been located.
After surviving such a horrific experience, Jewish groups claim, it seems deeply unfair that this poor schmuck should once again be incinerated, this time while participating in a pro-genocide demonstration.
“People who attack pro-genocide demonstrations are evil terrorists,” wrote Leo Terrel of the Justice Department’s Antisemitism Task Force. “Imagine a German attacking a ‘gas the Jews’ demonstration in Berlin in 1943! Would Hitler have put up with that? I don’t think so! And neither will we! Sig heil!”
The Anti-Defamation League says it plans to bury the Holocaust (TM) survivor in a swamp, let the corpse soak for a year or two, and then dig it up and cremate it—a process that should enable the poor twice-incinerated schmuck to survive and collect lavish reparations for another 80 years.
