Dissociated Press A Pentagon spokesperson reported Wednesday that the Chinese spy balloon shot down off South Carolina last week was a “Weaponized Hyperinflated Condom” (WHC) that posed a serious threat to America’s national virility. According to the report, the Chinese have developed a new polymer-layering nanotechnology that can be sprayed on the outside of an ordinary condom, giving it incredible…
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Dissociated Press Commenting on the world’s largest gathering of high-end prostitutes at the WEF meeting in Davos, former US Senator John Kerry let slip that some of the hustlers have come from the far ends of the galaxy to service the self-styled human elite: “When you start to think about it, it’s pretty extraordinary that we – an elite group…
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Dissociated Press President Biden and former President Trump are facing Justice Department investigations after security camera footage surfaced showing both men using classified documents as toilet paper. In the wake of the revelations, based on footage from restroom security cameras installed by multiple agencies including the CIA, NSA, FBI, ADL, and ASPCA, Attorney General Merrick Garland has appointed former Justice…
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Dissociated Press A South Carolina Republican Congressman is introducing a resolution that would, if passed, force the US National Parks Service to replace Washington, DC monuments and memorials with tributes to Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelensky. The resolution was introduced by Rep. Joe Wilson, R-S.C., on Monday and would direct the Park Service to replace the Lincoln Memorial and the Jefferson…
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Dissociated Press Republican Congressperson George Santos lashed out yesterday at the growing chorus calling on him to resign. Speaking at an impromptu press conference at Foneys Club in Lower Manhattan, Santos said that anyone who doubts that he is a gay Jewish Holocaust survivor is an “anti-Semitic Holocaust-denying homophobe.” Santos pointed out that according to woke (TM) identity politics, people are…
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https://youtu.be/LCcvzPW9CKs Dissociated Press The Anti-Defecation League has demanded that Bill Gates apologize for calling COVID vaccines “the Final Solution.” At a press conference in Basel, Switzerland, ADL chief Jonathan Greenbutt read a prepared statement flaying Gates for his insensitivity to Jewish suffering. “There is only one Final Solution,” Greenbutt intoned, “and that is the sacred six-million-victim big-H Holocaust. If Bill Gates…
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They don’t appreciate Fox News host comparing them to Zelensky Dissociated Press The Strip Club Owners of America, the industry’s leading Washington lobby, has demanded that Fox host Tucker Carlson apologize for what they called his “vile” comparison of them to Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelensky. “I don’t care if he’s the president of war-torn Timbuktu, this guy is a sleazeball,…
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Dissociated Press Plantation owner Jonathan Greenblatt has defended the ongoing torture of Ye, the uppity slave who has been nailed to a cross and abused nonstop for two months and counting. Below is an excerpt from Greenblatt’s interview on The Breakfast Club: Greenblatt: If we don’t get him, the slave revolt spreads and takes root. Interviewer: But doesn’t that just prove…
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Dissociated Press For only the second time in its history, Time Magazine has honored a Nazi as its favorite person of the year. Back in 1938, when people were still either male or female, Time‘s publisher, Nazi sympathizer Henry R. Luce, bestowed the magazine’s highest honor on Adolf Hitler…and scandalously and shamefully assumed “his” gender. Has history repeated itself? Not…
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Video link Qatar has lots of money, talent, stadium space, hotels, and airport runways. But it’s missing something important. It doesn’t have enough genders to host a World Cup. Can you imagine holding an athletic event in a country that only recognizes two genders? Don’t they know that “male” and “female” are passé, oppressive, and supremacist? Haven’t they heard that…
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