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Santos Attacks “Anti-Semitic Holocaust-Denying Homophobes” Who Are Badgering Him to Resign

Kevin Barrett

Dissociated Press Republican Congressperson George Santos lashed out yesterday at the growing chorus calling on him to resign. Speaking at an impromptu press conference at Foneys Club in Lower Manhattan, Santos said that anyone who doubts that he is a gay Jewish Holocaust survivor is an “anti-Semitic Holocaust-denying homophobe.” Santos pointed out that according to woke (TM) identity politics, people are…

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Bill Gates: “COVID Vaccines Are The Final Solution.” ADL: “That’s Anti-Semitic!”

Kevin Barrett

https://youtu.be/LCcvzPW9CKs Dissociated Press The Anti-Defecation League has demanded that Bill Gates apologize for calling COVID vaccines “the Final Solution.” At a press conference in Basel, Switzerland, ADL chief Jonathan Greenbutt read a prepared statement flaying Gates for his insensitivity to  Jewish suffering.  “There is only one Final Solution,” Greenbutt intoned, “and that is the sacred six-million-victim big-H Holocaust. If Bill Gates…

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Strip Club Owners Demand Apology From Tucker Carlson

Kevin Barrett

They don’t appreciate Fox News host comparing them to Zelensky Dissociated Press The Strip Club Owners of America, the industry’s leading Washington lobby, has demanded that Fox host Tucker Carlson apologize for what they called his “vile” comparison of them to Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelensky. “I don’t care if he’s the president of war-torn Timbuktu, this guy is a sleazeball,…

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Plantation Owner Greenblatt Defends Torturing Uppity Slave: “Look, If We Don’t Get Him, the Slave Revolt Spreads”

Kevin Barrett

Dissociated Press Plantation owner Jonathan Greenblatt has defended the ongoing torture of Ye, the uppity slave who has been nailed to a cross and abused nonstop for two months and counting. Below is an excerpt from Greenblatt’s interview on The Breakfast Club: Greenblatt: If we don’t get him, the slave revolt spreads and takes root. Interviewer: But doesn’t that just prove…

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Time Magazine Names Penis-Piano-Playing Nazi Cokehead “Person of the Year”

Kevin Barrett

Dissociated Press For only the second time in its history, Time Magazine has honored a Nazi as its favorite person of the year. Back in 1938, when people were still either male or female, Time‘s publisher, Nazi sympathizer Henry R. Luce, bestowed the magazine’s highest honor on Adolf Hitler…and scandalously and shamefully assumed “his” gender. Has history repeated itself? Not…

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Qatar Doesn’t Have Enough Genders to Host a World Cup

Kevin Barrett

Video link Qatar has lots of money, talent, stadium space, hotels, and airport runways. But it’s missing something important. It doesn’t have enough genders to host a World Cup. Can you imagine holding an athletic event in a country that only recognizes two genders? Don’t they know that “male” and “female” are passé, oppressive, and supremacist? Haven’t they heard that…

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Alex Jones Ordered to Pay Six Million Trillion Dollars to Holocaust Survivors

Kevin Barrett

Dissociated Press A Texas court has ordered conspiracy theorist Alex Jones to pay six million trillion dollars in damages to Holocaust survivors whose feelings were hurt by Jones’ interview with Holocaust denier David Duke. At a press conference in Austin, Jonathan Greenbutt of the  Anti-Defecation League celebrated the verdict: “We believe this unprecedented ruling will send the strongest possible message:…

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Ear-Cutters Cut off Van Gogh’s Cut-Off Ear to Protest Climate Change

Kevin Barrett

Dissociated Press Environmental activists blaming Vincent Van Gogh for climate change have mutilated the famous artist’s “Self Portrait Minus Ear” by slashing off part of the canvas with a razor blade. The activists severed and removed the portion of the painting depicting the bandage that covered the part of the artist’s head where the ear used to be, saying that…

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Sandy Hook Parent Robbie Parker Weeps in Despair After Learning He Just Won $120 Million

Kevin Barrett

Dissociated Press Sandy Hook parent Robbie Parker has once again raised eyebrows by reacting unexpectedly to an emotionally-charged event. Informed that a jury had awarded him $120 million, Parker collapsed on the floor, weeping pitifully, before pulling himself together, wiping away the tears, and flashing an insincere smile as he kicked off the Sandy Hook parents’ press conference celebrating their…

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WEF Withdraws “Eat Bugs” Edict

Kevin Barrett

Recommends Synthetic Insects Instead Dissociated Press The World Economic Forum has withdrawn its demand that people start eating bugs. Klaus Schlob, chair of the WEF’s Dietary Dystopias Committee, called a press conference in Davos yesterday to formally repudiate an earlier WEF communiqué headlined “You Will Eat Bugs and Be Happy.” That document had argued that traditional sources of protein such…

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